Releasing your kids to adulthood is a mixed blessing. You are both
proud and saddened. They are embracing maturity and that’s a good thing! But
your home will change after they leave, and that can be a confusing prospect.
Now is the time to prepare yourself
for these changes. While enjoying your kids’ remaining days at home, it’s
important to plan for what is to come
rather than simply ignoring it. Your
kids will be gone soon, therefore now is the time to figure out how
you will cope with the sadness of the new season.
Try the following 3 techniques to help you prepare yourself for an
While your kids are enjoying their freedom in independent living, you too can rejoice in your newfound freedom away from the kids and their limiting schedules.
You’ll be able to lounge around with your spouse without sharing the TV, and, once it’s safe to do so, host dinner parties on weeknights, take vacations during the school year, join clubs, or become more active in your church community.
This is the time to rediscover your interests. For so long, you’ve put your wants on the backburner. But now you can fully explore your interests and find a hobby that helps you feel needed, appreciated, and offers gratification.
After raising the children for so many years, living alone with your spouse is something that may feel new to you again. Now is the moment to feel like newlyweds! Reconnect with one another on a deeper level than you have in the last 20 years or so.
Every night is date night! Make something special for dinner a few times each week and then go out on the town on the weekends.
Take the time to enjoy this milestone in your relationship. You’ve raised wonderful children together. You’ve succeeded as parents and have held a successful marriage. You’re living your dream – have a toast to your success!
Properly planning a home improvement project takes time. Therefore, use the few months ahead while the kids are still at home to redo their bedroom once they have moved.
Turning their bedroom into a gym may be too much of a change. So, take baby steps. Maybe turn their bedroom into a guest bedroom. By doing so, you can comfortably accommodate both your adult children and guests.
Add a home office area to the bedroom so your kids can have a place to study when they come home on breaks. In addition, a simple armchair for reading, fresh paint, new linens, and accessories will make for a hotel-like retreat that guests can appreciate.
Generally, most teens won’t feel as if they’re being slighted when their childhood bedroom is given a makeover. If anything, they’ll feel better knowing that their parents are just as excited about the change.
In addition to all of the tips outlined above, plan ways to connect with your children while they’re away. Discuss how and how often you will connect. You might plan a monthly outing and a weekly Zoom call. Try to avoid placing too many demands on your adult child. It is unrealistic to expect a call every night!
It’s vital to remember that this is uncharted territory for everyone involved; it’s certainly a mixed bag of emotions.All you can do is try your best to look at the bright side and all of the benefits involved for your youngster. You aren’t losing a child; you’re gaining a young adult!
How are you handling the syndrome of the empty nest? Have your children flown out already or is the moment approaching? What are you planning to do with your life when there are no more obligations around your kids?
Let’s Have a Conversation!